humor, Uncategorized, writing

Finding my spirit animal

The cyber world has been abuzz with discussions of “spirit animals.”  Spirit animals, as I understand them, are an animal or totem meant to be a representation of you and your skills.  I see lots of people posting about wolves, bears, tigers or other charismatic mega fauna.  When a highly visible lion in Africa was killed by an American hunter, people from across the world claimed the lion as their spirit animal.

Do you have a spirit animal?  If not, you can always find one via the web.  There are dozens of quizzes you can take on Facebook to determine your own special creature that you are mystically connected through via time and space.

I sort of liked the idea of a spirit animal.  The American Indians have long seen spirit guides or animals as powerful guardians of the land or spirits of living animals.  And maybe adapting the characteristics of some amazing creatures from nature would help me transcend my daily routine.  Or maybe my spirit animal would show up at just the right moment to help guide my life.  A big black crow calling out winning lottery numbers would have been helpful yesterday.

But none of those so called “authentic” Facebook Find Your Spirit Animal quizzes ever worked for me.  One would say my spirit animal is a butterfly (speaks of transcendent destiny), while another would claim it was a Scarab beetle (guide to the cosmic universe.)  Really?  A Scarab beetle?  Maybe I should just be happy it wasn’t a dung beetle.  I was beginning to doubt the authenticity and reliability of the ‘net in my quest for my spirit animal.  Maybe these quizzes weren’t really written by trustworthy medicine men or  ancient Tibetan shamans.  Surely such a powerful and metaphysical concept wasn’t just a bunch of New Ag New Age poppy-cock written to entertain the masses?

So I consulted the oracles.  Except I don’t really have access to the oracles, so I chose the next best thing…the hipster beatnik who stands outside the gas station in his colorful authentic Etsy serape pancho.  He told me one doesn’t really get to pick one’s spirit animal.  It chooses you.  So disappointing.  If the Internet can’t rightly pick it and I can’t pick it, how would I ever know my true spirit animal?

I thought I was destined to wander through life alone and unguided.  Until today.  There on my news feed, in all his splendid glory, was my spirit animal.  I immediately identified with him on a visceral level.  My connection to him was positively existential.  I knew in my heart we had found each other.  Here he is…

My life is complete.


Posted by Best Vine Videos on Monday, January 11, 2016


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